Friday, May 04, 2007

What's in your head? In your head? Zombie, Zombie, Zombie?

The re-animated corpse of Ronald Reagan was happy last night as 10 guys who really hate abortion (and Rudy Giuliani) debated about Iraq, taxes, who was most like Reagan, and who wanted to kill Osama Bin Laden the most. And the winner was: Chris Matthews, who looked like he was ready to put another podium on stage and get up there. As a side note, how big is the Reagan Library? There was a life size Air Force One replica in there.

Last nights' goals, by candidate:

1) Giuliani: Convince people he believes in the sanctity of fetuses, black denizens of US cities.
2) Thompson: Confuse voters into pressing wrong lever while trying to vote for Law & Order Guy.
3) McCain: Don't die of old age during debate.
4) Paul: Answer three to four questions.
5) Brownback: Persuade Republican primary voters that he is not in actuality a Native American.
6) Hunter: Make sure people don't think he's Duke Cunningham.
7) Huckabee: Don't tell anyone he is also from Hope, Arkansas and that his wife is also the devil incarnate
8) Romney: Don't reveal he actually lives in house with three families, owns Hardware store franchise.
9) Gilmore: Remind people he was once slightly involved in politics.
10) Tancredo: Trick anti-immigrant supporters into thinking Tancredo not Italian name


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