Friday News Roundup
- President Bush has abandoned his Iraq mantra, "Stay the course", in favor of the new slogan, "Make your peace with God now". Do not be surprised if he and Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld soon relocate to Guyana and buy large quantities of Kool-Aid.
- The Cardinals went up 3 games to 1 on the Tigers yesterday, utterly bumming me out. But, since I've watched exactly one pitch of this series, at least I don't have to have it shoved in my face. Oh, here's something I never knew -- David Eckstein is scrappy.
- The wheels are fully coming off for Republican candidates everywhere. Highlights include:
- Michael J. Fox flipping and flopping and dealing a potential death blow to Jim Talent in the US Senate race in Missouri, resulting in Jim Caviezel speaking in Aramaic in a response ad. No joke.
- Married Nevada Gubernatorial candidate and current Congressman Jim Gibbons tried to sleep with a Las Vegas showgirl, then tried to bribe her not to tell her story, then it was discovered he has had an illegal nanny.
- And my absolute favorite, from Macaca himself, George "I put the Jim in Crow" Allen put out a press release attacking Jim "I need public speaking lessons" Webb by quoting sexually tinged passages from Webb's novels. Webb responded by saying, "What, are you an idiot?" Allen followed up by saying: "Oh, you remember all those times I insulted blacks? And wore confederate flag pins? And hung a noose in my office? And put a deer's head in a black family's mailbox? You remember all that? Ok, that doesn't matter because I was acting in a one man play, "Racist Like Me".
- Hey, Jim McGreevey is back in news! The New Jersey Supreme Court yesterday decided that gays can legally marry in New Jersey. Whoa! Won't that destroy the moral fiber of the Garden State? Haha, we're talking about New Jersey, never mind.
Anyway, McGreevey said that he would marry his boyfriend if the courts allowed it. I hope McGreevey and Michael Strahan will live happily ever after.
- The Cardinals went up 3 games to 1 on the Tigers yesterday, utterly bumming me out. But, since I've watched exactly one pitch of this series, at least I don't have to have it shoved in my face. Oh, here's something I never knew -- David Eckstein is scrappy.
- The wheels are fully coming off for Republican candidates everywhere. Highlights include:
- Michael J. Fox flipping and flopping and dealing a potential death blow to Jim Talent in the US Senate race in Missouri, resulting in Jim Caviezel speaking in Aramaic in a response ad. No joke.
- Married Nevada Gubernatorial candidate and current Congressman Jim Gibbons tried to sleep with a Las Vegas showgirl, then tried to bribe her not to tell her story, then it was discovered he has had an illegal nanny.
- And my absolute favorite, from Macaca himself, George "I put the Jim in Crow" Allen put out a press release attacking Jim "I need public speaking lessons" Webb by quoting sexually tinged passages from Webb's novels. Webb responded by saying, "What, are you an idiot?" Allen followed up by saying: "Oh, you remember all those times I insulted blacks? And wore confederate flag pins? And hung a noose in my office? And put a deer's head in a black family's mailbox? You remember all that? Ok, that doesn't matter because I was acting in a one man play, "Racist Like Me".
- Hey, Jim McGreevey is back in news! The New Jersey Supreme Court yesterday decided that gays can legally marry in New Jersey. Whoa! Won't that destroy the moral fiber of the Garden State? Haha, we're talking about New Jersey, never mind.
Anyway, McGreevey said that he would marry his boyfriend if the courts allowed it. I hope McGreevey and Michael Strahan will live happily ever after.
posted by quint at 12:00 PM
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